Sunday 5 March 2023

Turnips

Sunday morning at the mill, and Deliberation Dave is building up courage to tell Terry Tuttle-Thomas-Smythe that his flies are undone, or ‘flying low’ as we say in Little England. Terry has a bit of a habit in this region, this probably the result of constantly saying ‘look, no hands’ and then forgetting to do up his zipper. 

To the left Colin and Eric are waiting for the engine to return with a wagon load of freshly harvested turnips. Turnips, for those reading this post in foreign climes, are the main source of food in Little England. They’re used in everything, replacing staples like tomatoes, fish, cheese, Dairylea slices and even turkey at Christmas time. A well known fast food chain even has a much celebrated turnip burger, where a hearty slice of warm turnip is sandwiched within a succulent turnip bun garnished with turnip purée. And for vegans, you can even buy turnips picked by vegans for a paltry 15% premium, what’s not to like? 

To the right, Farmer George’s identical twin brother who is also called George,  has arrived to stock up with moonshine (made from turnips of course). As usual the moonshine will be disguised to look like large turnips, because of course in Little England, cheese has been replaced with cave aged turnips by order of the cigar smoking lady at The Ministry of Misery. 

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If you enjoyed this post, you can refresh my flawed creativity with a turnip based beverage at www.buymeacoffee.com/Nevardmedi3

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